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Dealing with unwanted communication, such as harassing phone calls, texts, or emails during a divorce, can be overwhelming and distressing. Knowing how to stop harassing, illegal calls from an ex-partner helps protect your peace of mind during this difficult time.
This guide, prepared by the skilled Raleigh divorce attorneys at Doyle Divorce Law, provides practical steps, legal remedies, and resources to address harassment and stalking. Our team's priority is to ensure you can focus on your divorce proceedings without the added stress of harassment.
Table of Contents
What Constitutes Harassing Communication from an Ex?
While its always annoying to receive telemarketing calls, calls from debt collectors, or phone scams, experiencing harassing voicemail messages from an ex-partner during the divorce process can be extra frustrating and distressing. Knowing what counts as harassing communication during a separation or divorce is important to settling the matter in a court of law.
Repeated Phone Calls and Voicemails
Constant or unwanted calls, particularly late at night or multiple times a day, are considered a common form of harassment. Even if no threats are made or if the calls are in the form of repeated hang ups, the sheer volume of calls can create intimidation and anxiety during the divorce process.
Threatening or Abusive Messages
Any voicemail, text, or email that contains threats, abusive language, or derogatory remarks is harassment. This includes attempts to manipulate or intimidate the other person emotionally.
Harassment Through Social Media
Publicly posting harmful or false statements, tagging someone repeatedly, or sending private, unwanted messages on platforms like Facebook or Instagram are also recognized forms of harassment that can disrupt divorce court proceedings.
Harassment via Email or Digital Communication
Persistent, unwanted emails, especially those with threatening content or meant to harass, are treated similarly to phone or text harassment under North Carolina law.
North Carolina Laws on Harassing Communication
In North Carolina, harassing communication is prohibited under N.C. Gen. Stat. § 14‑196. This statute makes it illegal to use any form of electronic or digital communication, including phone calls, text messages, or emails, to intentionally annoy, abuse, threaten, or harass another person.
Key points of the law include:
- Repeated or Threatening Calls: Making repeated phone calls or sending messages with the intent to harass, even if no conversation occurs, can be considered a crime.
- Obscene or Threatening Language: Any use of profane, vulgar, or threatening language during calls or messages is classified as unlawful communication.
- Penalties: Violations are typically charged as a Class 2 misdemeanor, which can result in fines, probation, or even jail time depending on the severity of the harassment.
Why Address Unwanted Calls of Harassment Promptly?
Persistent unwanted calls or prerecorded messages can disrupt your life and complicate divorce proceedings. Taking action early can prevent escalation, protect your mental well-being, and provide evidence for legal remedies if needed.
Practical Steps to Stop Calls from a Former Partner
Dealing with constant or unwanted calls from a former partner can feel overwhelming, especially during or after a divorce. Whether the communication is emotionally draining, disruptive, or crosses the line into harassment, it’s important to take proactive steps to regain your peace of mind.
Set Clear Boundaries
One of the first steps in stopping unwanted calls is to set clear, firm boundaries with your former partner. Clearly communicate that all discussions should be limited to necessary matters, such as child custody or financial arrangements, and should take place through respectful, appropriate channels.
In some cases, your divorce attorney can help draft a formal legal document with a written permission agreement that all communication occurs in writing, such as emails or messages exchanged through your respective divorce teams, to prevent unwanted phone calls or verbal harassment. This approach not only reduces stress but also creates a clear record of all interactions.
Block Unwanted Calls
Most mobile phone and home phone carriers offer built-in features to block calls from specific numbers. Contact your phone service provider to enable call blocking or visit their website for instructions. For example, major phone companies provide options to block unwanted calls, which may need to be updated every 90 days unless you opt for a paid call blocking service.
While this can work to avoid receiving unwanted calls, it may not be the best course of action if you want to have physical evidence of a call log for the purpose of obtaining child custody or divorce agreements.
Use Call Labeling and Caller ID
Modern cell phones often include call labeling features that identify potential phone scammers or telemarketing calls. Activate these settings to filter incoming calls and reduce disturbances from your ex-spouse. If the harassment persists, consider changing your phone number and sharing it only with trusted contacts to avoid further issues.
Register with the National Do Not Call Registry
To reduce telemarketing calls, you can register your mobile phone number or home phone with the National Do Not Call Registry at donotcall.gov to be removed from national call lists. This free service can limit legitimate telemarketing but may not stop illegal calls from a live person such as your ex-husband or ex-wife.
Report Unwanted Calls
If you receive calls from scammers or sales calls from telemarketers ignoring the National Do Not Call Registry, file complaints with the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) at reportfraud.ftc.gov. For scam calls demanding money or personal information, such as social security numbers, report them immediately to protect yourself and others.
Use Third-Party Apps
Apps like Nomorobo or Truecaller offer advanced call blocking services to filter robocalls, telemarketing calls, and potential scams. These apps can block specific numbers and provide real-time call labeling, helping you avoid answering unwanted calls.
Civil Restraining Orders to Stop Harassing Phone Calls
If the harassing party is a current or former spouse, someone you’ve lived with, or a person you’ve been in a dating relationship with, you may qualify for a domestic violence restraining order under Chapter 50B of the North Carolina General Statutes. This applies if the communication causes substantial emotional distress or includes threats. For non-romantic relationships, such as a former friend, a Civil No Contact Order under Chapter 50C may be appropriate.
Steps to Obtain a Restraining Order in North Carolina
- Document the Harassment: Keep records of unwanted calls, voicemails, texts, social media contact, or emails. Respond only through written communication to the harasser, stating they must cease contact, as this can serve as evidence.
- Consult an Attorney: A Raleigh family law attorney can guide you through filing for a restraining order.
- File with the Court: Submit your evidence to the court, specifying the nature of the harassment and its impact on your life.
Criminal Remedies for Cyberstalking
North Carolina’s cyberstalking law makes it illegal to use electronic communication, such as emails or phone calls, to threaten, harass, or extort. Violations are classified as a Class 2 misdemeanor.
Key Provisions of the Cyberstalking Law
| Violation | Description | Penalty |
|---|---|---|
| Threatening Communication | Using words or language to threaten bodily harm or extort money. | Class 2 Misdemeanor |
| Repeated Harassment | Repeatedly contacting someone to annoy, threaten, or harass. | Class 2 Misdemeanor |
| False Statements | Making false statements about a person’s family to intimidate or embarrass. | Class 2 Misdemeanor |
Stopping Harassing Calls FAQs
How do I stop harassing phone calls from my ex-spouse?
Use your phone’s call blocking features, register with the National Do Not Call Registry, and document all communication. If the harassment persists, consult a Raleigh divorce attorney to explore restraining orders or criminal charges.
Can I block scam calls or robocalls during my divorce?
Yes, activate call labeling on your mobile phone or use apps like Nomorobo to filter scam calls. Report illegal robocalls to the FTC to help stop scammers.
What should I do if I receive antagonizing voicemails?
Save voicemails as evidence, send a written request to the harasser to stop contact, and consult an attorney to discuss legal options like a restraining order.
What should I do if my ex-spouse is sending harassing phone calls through our children?
If your ex-spouse is using your children to deliver harassing or manipulative messages, it’s important to address the situation promptly. Document each instance, including dates, times, and the nature of the messages, as this can serve as evidence if legal action is needed. You may also consider involving your attorney or requesting a court order that restricts communication to formal, written channels, ensuring that your children are not placed in the middle of parental conflicts.
Protect Yourself During Divorce with Our Raleigh Law Office
Navigating harassment during a divorce, alongside complex issues like asset distribution, spousal support, and child custody issues, requires experienced legal support. The Doyle Law Group, P.A., proudly serves Raleigh, Wake County, Durham County, Johnston County, and beyond. Our attorneys are skilled in handling domestic violence orders, civil no-contact orders, and other family law matters.
Schedule a consultation today by calling us at (919) 301-8843 or filling out our contact form below to get started.
